There are few, if any, reasons I can justify complaining about living in the Lower Mainland, but the rain is one of them. That and the hay fever. Somehow one day of rain makes all memory-- and benefit-- of a week's worth of sun all but disappear from memory. A week of grey clouds that obstruct the view of the sky and mountains is enough to trigger full blown fishbowl effect. The world becomes a very confined place and small issues and feelings begin to look massive and unbeatable.
As someone who has and continues to periodically struggle with depression, these longer, brighter, sunnier days are a God-send. The January/February doldrums hit hard this year and I found myself searching rather desperately for ways to shake the oppressive sadness that seemed like it wouldn't go away.
As someone who has and continues to periodically struggle with depression, these longer, brighter, sunnier days are a God-send. The January/February doldrums hit hard this year and I found myself searching rather desperately for ways to shake the oppressive sadness that seemed like it wouldn't go away.
So what do you do when sadness has you down? Here are a few things that I have found to help.
Share your feelings.
Maybe you're like me and keep feelings bottled inside. Maybe you don't want to burden others with the responsibility of knowing and caring about your sadness. After all, it is 'just sadness'. Stop it. Whether it is to your spouse, a friend or your small group, at least share that you have feelings. You are not alone and the voices inside your head telling you that are lying. Which takes me to the next point…
Take every thought captive. (2 Cor 10:5-6)
As one who follows Christ, listening to and believing lies about who I am goes against God’s desire for my life. As Christians, we have been set free from bondage and yet those voices-- both in our heads and in the world-- do not stop. Speaking truth in the face of the lies cuts off any power that they have. So many of us, me included, have come to believe the lies without really realizing it.
Here is a trick. Spend some time writing down your train of thought, your inner monologue. Notice what the voices are saying to you, that you aren't good enough, that you will never succeed, that you should give up, that you don’t deserve what you have been given, that you are guilty despite being forgiven. Write those statements down and below them write the truth. Ask God what he desires for your life and make those words your mantra. I am free! My God loves me! I have a voice and a message from God! Life is a gift and it is our responsibility to accept it.
Discipline.
I am a dreamer. My wife will tell you stories of our first couple years of marriage. About how I would continually declare my big ideas about grand projects or plans for adventures. 99% of those dreams came to nothing, often resulting in deep disappointment. Although my wife has learned to take my expulsions with a grain of salt, I always let myself get too close to my crazy ideas. They fail and I am, inevitably, a failure. It follows, then, that failures will continue to fail and that any other ideas on the burner consequently fail as well. This results in compounding despair. This is what we call a depression spiral.
As you can probably tell it is very hard to get out of the spiral, the vortex of self pity. So how does discipline come into it? My problem is that when I dream I see the end goal only and fail to map out the steps to get me there. I see end-zone but don’t even think to call a play. I don’t even bring the ball to the game. It makes sense that these kind of dreams will fail. So I started writing down my goals then breaking them into steps. Every goal needs a road map to take you to it. Sometimes its boring or tedious doing the leg work but its necessary to get you to the end.
I also started getting up earlier. When I am not rushed in the morning I have increased control over my day. I don’t have to deal with as many surprises; surprises throw off my state of mind and make it harder for me to make positive decisions.
The mind is a powerful thing. Its easy to take it for granted and when we do it has the power to wreak havoc in our lives. When not paid attention to, when we leave it to its own devices, we are not heeding the desire of God who tells us to be anxious about nothing (Phil 4:6-7), take every thought captive, and dwell on what is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable (Phil 4:8).
God is much bigger than any word can describe or any thought imagine. Don’t forsake this life for one in a fish bowl.
As you can probably tell it is very hard to get out of the spiral, the vortex of self pity. So how does discipline come into it? My problem is that when I dream I see the end goal only and fail to map out the steps to get me there. I see end-zone but don’t even think to call a play. I don’t even bring the ball to the game. It makes sense that these kind of dreams will fail. So I started writing down my goals then breaking them into steps. Every goal needs a road map to take you to it. Sometimes its boring or tedious doing the leg work but its necessary to get you to the end.
I also started getting up earlier. When I am not rushed in the morning I have increased control over my day. I don’t have to deal with as many surprises; surprises throw off my state of mind and make it harder for me to make positive decisions.
The mind is a powerful thing. Its easy to take it for granted and when we do it has the power to wreak havoc in our lives. When not paid attention to, when we leave it to its own devices, we are not heeding the desire of God who tells us to be anxious about nothing (Phil 4:6-7), take every thought captive, and dwell on what is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable (Phil 4:8).
God is much bigger than any word can describe or any thought imagine. Don’t forsake this life for one in a fish bowl.
Andrew you have such a way with words. Your writing is beautiful and truly has made me stop and reflect on my own life. Thank you for sharing. God has blessed you with this gift of writing. Never stop!
ReplyDelete